The paths we walk
by KiraKyoushu
Summary: It'd been years since the decision to give Isabela up had ruined her life, since then Hawke has travelled and changed. Never in a 100 years did she imagine their paths would cross again, let alone for the reason they parted. Arishok/ F!Hawke. Human/ Qunari. Rated M for violence, and there shall be romance in later chapters. -Updated-
1. Chapter 1

**This is based on Hawke leaving after the Qunari event. Forgive the first chapter but I wanted to give you a better idea of what my Hawke is about!**

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Hawke had lost it all. Her whole family. And now Isabela. Her rage should have been overwhelming, but all she could feel was the hollow ache of loss. It was numbing now. She stood outside the mansion in her bloodied armour, rain drenching her very bones. She could not bear to go inside. Her fists clenched at her side, she turned and ran. The cold winds slapped her face as she ran until her legs gave out, finding herself short of land at the docks. Thunder roared above her and lighting stabbed at the earth from afar. She collapsed to her knees at the waters edge, waves attacking the shore. The odd wave lashed out at her, pushing her back. The cold bit her skin but she could hardly feel it. The sky roared as if the maker shared her pain, and she screamed back. It didn't feel strange or out of place, it felt right. Her cries being drowned out by the storm around her. It was dark and the Qunari ships were already on the horizon. That was the night Hawke died.

It had now been years since that fateful day in Kirkwall. The day she'd given them Isabela. Everyone knew one person was not worth a war with the Qunari, but that didn't stop the judgement in their eyes. They avoided her like the plague, keeping their distance. Nobles had cheered, but they'd sacrifice a new born child if it got them what they wanted, the pigs. Kirkwall truly was a disease, it had cost her everything. Her whole family was dead, and it's politics had cost her any friends she might've had. Varric tried, maker knows, but even he couldn't meet her eyes after that. She'd become close to Fenris in that time, a needed emotional and physical release. His cold practicality left him mostly unfazed by the ordeal, he'd often wonder what people had actually expected. He stood by her choice. He'd put Hawke back on her feet again, as they secluded away from everyone. She shared in his solitude for a while, and when Hawke was ready, he helped her leave Kirkwall. Even he couldn't deny there was no place for her there anymore. At the docks, the source of so much pain, she could finally leave the wretched place. He was the only one she had said goodbye to, and even she knew not where she was heading. This would be a story not even Varric could finish.

Three years she'd spent travelling alone, training, improving herself. The only time she came near towns was to collect the gold she'd earn killing off local pests, dragons and the like. Often she'd find herself on another boat, going somewhere new. She never cared where, she'd spent time in lands of constant snow, places basked in blistering heat with sand as far as the eye could see. Now she was on an island, one she was told was mostly uninhabited aside from a few small farming villages. Forest as far as the eye could see and a pleasant climate, it was her kind of place. Years ago she'd been a skilled rogue, and now she was so much more. She thought back proudly on some of her victories as she hiked her way up into the woods, finding an area far enough inland to make a camp. She was versatile, she'd had to be. Numerous had been the times she'd found herself in a fight with no weapons or armour, she'd quickly learnt how to adapt. She mostly chose to use two long curved blades, roughly the length of her arm and worn on her back in leather wrapped sheaths. She'd even begun to favour hand to hand combat, as she'd spent some time in a temple being trained. Learning to exploit pressure points she'd made over grown men crumple like weeds. She was fond of her blades, but she was at her deadliest in close quarters. Throwing up a simple shelter by a small stream that ran through the narrow opening she'd found, she began to disrobe her heavier items. Leaving herself in tight black trousers and boots with a white chest wrap, she breathed in the fresh air. Her body was unrecognisable now, compared to years ago. Gone were the signs of a comfortable living, what remained was a toned, lean and firm figure. Yet still feminine, Hawke hadn't lost her curves. Her porcelain skin was now littered with scars of all shapes and sizes, although most would feel ruined, she finally felt at one with herself. Her once short black hair had been allowed to grow down to her waist, often tied up or plaited, she let it hang loose now as she combed through it. Her bangs hadn't changed however, the strands flirted with her long dark eyelashes and deep, white-blue eyes. The rest of her bangs flicked onto her cheeks and curved away just below her chin, framing her strong cheek bones and soft ruby lips. Long having discarded the heavy armour of her past life, she preferred much lighter clothing now, embracing the practicality and freedom of movement it brought. She was less defended but her lightning fast attacks reinforced with a deadly strength often left her without need for the heavy coverage.

She held no resentment toward the Qunari for what happened, they had treated her with more respect than most, they had a duty to fulfil and they did it. It was not them who turned their backs on her, who pointed and whispered in the streets. In fact she'd even come to appreciate their forward way of thinking. She was a skilled fighter, and since committing herself to that single role she'd advanced in ways she never expected of herself. She still liked to wear the red stain across her nose and cheeks, although she felt as if she'd earned it now. It marked her as a warrior. She was colder, calculated.

"To accept and succeed, or to deny and die." She remembered questioning the Arishok's reasoning at the time, but now she saw what he truly meant. Qunari jobs are distributed based on who shows the most skill for the task, to deny what you are good at is to deny yourself. She sighed to herself as the sky began to darken, jumping up to a low branch and hooking her legs over it, she fell back to start performing sit-ups. So lost in her trail of thought, she nearly missed the slight crack of dry wood in the distance. She froze in place, looking much like a caterpillar in it's cocoon as she hung from the branch. Like a Doe with it's ears pricked, she listened, and just as surely heard another crackle. Almost instantly she pulled herself to a higher branch, retreating into the foliage as two tall pale figures entered the small clearing.  
She'd almost bit her own tongue off in an attempt not to cuss the Maker's sense of humour. Qunari, here, of all the damned to Fade places.


	2. Chapter 2

**I'm sorry it's another short one, I was just aching to get the second chapter posted tonight! The next one will be longer and much more interesting, I promise!**

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Somewhat taken aback by the familiar sight of the painted stone men, she paused. Watching as they looked around the clearing and poked at her shelter. A growing pit in her stomach told her they weren't just passing by, they were looking for something, _someone_.  
She had no idea how she'd managed to stray so close, she'd been so sure to avoid their known locations. She slipped silently to a lower branch and waited, like a jaguar ready to pounce. The light of the moon reflected off their pale skin as they gestured to one another. Wherever they came from and whatever they wanted she didn't want to know, but there was no escape from her perch without being seen. Chewing on her lip she waited for them to edge closer. As much as she respected the Qunari, the last thing she wanted was to get caught up in a another political mess. Finally, her chance came. Leaping from her branch she grabbed the first by his right horn, and used the force of her jump to drag it into the second Sten's neck as he turned. Arterial blood spatter painted her neck and body as the second Sten reared away from his ally in surprise. He roared as he charged at her, weapon drawn, his own face covered in blood. As he neared her she hunched and crouched, swinging around him and using her fingers to hit the pressure points in his legs. The Sten Grunted as he fell face first into the dirt. She had to leave now, the Qunari soldier would not be immobilised for long, dashing to her weapons she threw them on her back. But no sooner had she stood again then an explosion blind-sided her, throwing her in to a nearby tree. She barely had time to see the other Qunari edge into the clearing before her vision blacked out and she sank to the ground with a thud.

Her eyes struggled to open to a blurred vision, she had no idea how much time had passed, but she was moving. She could feel a strong hand wrapped around each arm, clawed nails biting her skin as they dragged her forwards. She could feel her weapons were gone, along with her bag and any potions. As her vision began to clear she focused more on her surroundings, she could hear the deep, even breathing of the men dragging her. The rustle of leather and gentle clang of armour as they walked, raising her head she could see they were in some sort of compound surrounded by a huge wooden pike wall- easily 25 foot tall. She glanced around her and saw the familiar sight of war paint, there were few men about, it must've been quite late by then. A bustle of commotion began around them as Sten began to fall into place. She almost didn't want to look up, knowing who would be sat there, looking down at her in an all too familiar way. Allowing her head to hang further forward she wished herself into the ground.

"Shanedan, Serah Hawke." Oh how the sound of that deep voice made her shiver. The idea of the ground swallowing her whole was becoming ever more appealing.  
At her lack of response a Sten grabbed her hair and forced her to look up. Her eyes met his silver pools for an instant, before she looked away. She could imagine what he must have thought of her in this state, covered in blood and grime from the explosion, which thankfully hadn't done much in the way of damage. Qunari would not waste even the smallest amount of Gaatlok, she was alive for a reason. Hawke bit her lip and continued to look away. The last time She'd seen the Arishok was when she'd handed over Isabela.  
"Arishok." She grunted, still groggy and not wanting to meet his gaze.  
The Arishok flicked his hand and she was let go, the two Sten moved back, allowing her to stand on her own. She spat blood from her mouth and ran her tongue over her sharp teeth. Taking in the laughably familiar surroundings. A few small steps rose to a large chair that seated the Arishok.

"Why am I here?" She queried, crossing her arms over her chest. Glancing about nervously, she finally met his steel gaze.  
"The Qun requires it."

"Elaborate."  
"You are a solution."  
She almost threw her hands up in the air with frustration, she'd almost, _almost_, forgotten how difficult it could be to get a straight or lengthy answer from a Qunari. Seeing her obvious annoyance, the Arishok decided to ease her with a better explanation.  
"The thief escaped us, with the Tome. Beresaad saw you arrive at the docks. We decided you would be a... practical solution. The thief will come for you."  
It wasn't until he finished she realised her mouth was hanging open. She almost laughed. So Isabela had gotten away, and most likely taken the tome out of spite. Isabela was hot headed and vengeful, there was truth in the Arishok's words. She would come for Hawke.

"When?" Was just about all she could manage.  
"Halfway to Par Vollen." Even he could not hide his anger at being denied his home yet again.  
"Over two years ago..." She murmured. "And you tracked her here?"

He gave a brief nod as a reply.

"No." Was her only response.

The Arishok quirked an eyebrow in interest. "It was not a request."  
"The decision I made that day cost me everything. The people I love, those that were still alive, couldn't stand to look me in the eye! I betrayed someone close to me for the sake of someone else's politics. I _made_ the hard choice, and you have _no _right to drag me back into this! _You're _the ones too incompetent to keep a hold of it!" She spat, venom overflowing as the pain bubbled up.

"Parshaara!" He cut her off.  
Judging by the look on his face, she was fairly sure she was about to find out if the Qunari back-handed people. Although his anger wasn't without reason, he knew the tome had once again been lost under his command.

She was not about to be used to once again trap someone once dear to her, she didn't care if she had to make a pile of bodies and climb the damn walls of this place, she was _not_ staying.

"You are not permitted to leave, your stay can be pleasant or not, the choice is yours." He stated calmly, rising from his chair.

A growl bubbled in her throat as a few Sten that had gathered stepped forward. More had appeared now than she could safely handle. Thinking practically she remained composed, getting out of here was going to be a lot easier if she wasn't chained in some pit. Almost shaking with rage she nodded in compliance. The Arishok turned to leave, nodding over his shoulder to his men before disappearing into a large red tent. The same two Sten that brought her here began bustling her towards another tent. Inside were rows of large wooden tubs that nearly reached her chin. The air was thick with steam, pipes along the floors carried the hot water to the baths, and a shower-spout above each filled them. There were one or two men in there already, seemingly unfazed by her presence. She kept her gaze trained intently on the ground and vaguely heard herself being introduced to a Viddathari elf. Who much to Hawke's shock, promptly started pulling her trousers off for her.

"Come now" the elf ushered "Let's get you cleaned up."

Hawke was taken aback by how much the girl reminded her of Merrill, but was soon brought back to her senses as a bucket of water was thrown over her by said elf.

"What!?" Hawke spluttered, spitting the warm water from her mouth.

"Well you can't go in the bath like that! You'll turn the water red!" The elf giggled, sponging Hawke down- still in her undergarments.

At that moment an Arvaarad and his Saarebas entered the tent and stood by the door, presumably to watch over her, just as the Viddathari began prompting her to remove her undergarments. Hawke had to protest.

"In front of an audience!?" She scoffed.

The Arvaarad huffed and turned his back. Hawke rolled her eyes and figured that would have to do, walking up the steps to the bath she quickly removed the last of her clothing and jumped in. The elf next to the tub squealed, presumably splashed by the action- and Hawke couldn't help but to chuckle to herself as she sank into the half-full tub. She sighed and banged her head against the solid wood, letting the heat soak her tired body. Merrill's similar bell-like giggle rang through her mind. And so did the way she looked horrified with Hawke when she was told what happened. She'd never forget the way the naïve elf cried and slammed the door in her face. She supposed she deserved that.

"He respects you, you know. That's most unusual." Came the soft voice of the elf. "I mean, for a Bas, well, not that you are, being Basalit-an, so I suppose. Oh. I don't know what I'm saying." Maker! They even spoke alike. "You can find comfort here, as we all do. You've been through a lot it seems."  
"You don't know me." Hawke quipped. Sinking further into the tub as the rest of the bath was spent in silence.

Afterwards the Viddathari provided her with a leather chest wrap, that instead of going around the body criss-crossed over it. This left a fair bit more cleavage on show and was not entirely practical- thankfully she was also given a black vest and some plain black cotton trousers.

"It's the best we can do, for now." She'd apologised, before guiding her out and back to the steps.

Much to Hawk's surprise she led her up to the large tent the Arishok had disappeared into earlier. She stopped just outside and ushered Hawke in, who nearly fell straight into the Arishok.

"You are finished." He bluntly observed. Moving back to a candle lit desk in the corner of the tent. Next to which was a small table, close to the ground and surrounded by pillows. She assumed it was for eating, as a small covered basket lay in the middle next to a metal teapot and carved wooden cups. The tent seemed to be made from an extremely thick fabric, you couldn't see through it at all and it made the sounds of the camp outside almost silent. There was one very large bed In the centre, and a much smaller one a foot away from it. Both adorned with furs.

"Oh hell no." She almost chocked. No way in hell was she sharing a room with the Arishok, although to call the huge tent a room seemed to make it sound far too small. She was skilled, but she wasn't entirely sure if even she could sneak out from under the Arishok's unwavering gaze. She guessed he'd gotten a bit pissed off with his prisoners sneaking off, and had decided he'd do a better job of watching them himself.

"Eat." He ordered, gesturing to the small basket on the table. she sat cross-legged at the end furthest from him, and watched as he returned to the papers on his desk.

She sighed and helped herself to a cup of tea, it smelt extremely sweet and spiced. She couldn't put her finger on what it was, cinnamon? In any case it warmed her throat and bones in the most relaxing way. In the basket she found a few bread rolls with some cheeses and cured meats. It smelt great and she happily made herself a sandwich. She finished and sat patiently in silence for over an hour, closing her eyes and listening to the world around her, meditating almost. She nearly had a heart attack when the Arishok was the one to break the silence.

"You have Changed, Hawke." He simply noted, not even turning to look at her.

"Yes." She offered an equally simple response. He briefly lifted his gaze to meet hers, before gesturing to the smaller bed.

"Sleep." He ordered, and being half asleep from the tea already, she complied.  
Sinking into the soft furs, she'd definitely forgotten what it felt like to sleep on anything other than the ground. It felt like she would fall through the cloud of softness. It was fairly uncomfortable at first, feeling so unstable and alien, but she happily adjusted and turned her back to the Arishok. Somewhat more awake than she let on, she listened to his steady breathing, and what felt like hours later, the slight creak and rustle of him entering his own bed.


	3. Chapter 3

Welcoming any honest feedback on the story so far, please review!

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By the time she awoke he was already back at his desk, as if he'd never slept. It was barely dawn and she laid there and watched him in silence for a while. Even in his full paint and armour she could see the thick muscle of his back. Hardly a minute had passed into her observation when he spoke.  
"You are awake."  
She sighed in response, feeling the ache settle back into her body.  
"Come." He ordered, getting up and walking out without even looking at her.

Hawke rolled her eyes and sat up, letting the soft furs slip off her. Pulling on her vest, trousers and boots, she quickly pulled her hair back into a messy bun before meeting the Arishok outside. Surprised by all the bustle outside for such an early hour, she hadn't realised just how large the camp had been, in truth it was closer to a small village. Many Qunari filled the streets already, preparing for the day ahead, and the Arishok watched them from his high perch upon the steps.

"You wouldn't make it past these steps, Hawke." He warned her, gesturing around and dismissing her hopes of escape once and for all.  
She stood behind him in silence for a while. Perhaps she should stay, she deserved to face whatever Isabela had for her. And If Isabela was stupid enough to come to a Qunari compound for her revenge, perhaps she deserved to be caught. Stirring from her thoughts she noticed a Sten ascending the steps. He shot a disgruntled glance at Hawke before speaking to the Arishok in Qunlat.

"They don't like to be seen not speaking the common tongue well, and would rather remain silent." The bell-like voice of the Viddathari elf came from behind her. Hawke practically jumped out of her skin. She suppose that made sense, it certainly explained why they would never answer anyone, or if they did they spoke so briefly. But when the hell did that elf climb the stairs?  
"Time for your bath!" she squeaked, pulling Hawke by her wrist down the steps. She had a surprisingly stern grip for such a small frame.

"Again?" Somewhat surprised, she'd just had one what felt like hours ago. She couldn't smell that bad, surely?  
"Every morning, it helps cleanse us for the day ahead. Last night you were just filthy."The Viddathari giggled. "Besides, you'll be expected to visit a nearby farming town with a group of Karataam and Sten, looking for information."  
Oh, great. She supposed it made sense, she spoke the common tongue the best and she'd certainly be memorable among a group of Qunari. And that's what the Arishok really wanted, for the villagers to pass around the description of Hawke until it reached Isabela. She assumed the group of mages and their handlers were to watch her. He really wasn't taking any chances, was he?  
So she was bathed and cleansed and had the smell of spiced orange shampoo stuck in her nose again, not that she would complain. The Viddathari had provided her with new, clean versions of what she'd given her night before.

"No weapons." She chided, wiggling a finger in Hawkes face as a mother would a child. "I would offer you armour but the Sten say you came with none?"  
"It's too heavy." Hawke shrugged off the explanation.  
The Viddathari nodded in understanding, and proceeded to comb Hawke's hair and tie it in a long plait behind her head.

The first five hours of the day went just as the Viddathari promised, it took that long just for the parade to get to two villages, it certainly was a big island. She'd resorted to humouring herself with a one sided conversation with the Saarebas from the bath house. Well, she was as likely to get an answer through those stitched lips as any other. Eventually the group made it back to camp and she was once again bustled inside like a difficult child. Forced to stand as the group reported back to the Arishok in Qunlat from the bottom of the stairs.  
"Saarebas is not a toy, Hawke." He'd chided.

When they'd finished and the Arishok was satisfied that it was enough for the day, the Viddathari elf popped back up to herd her into the tent when she was promptly sat and told to eat while she waited for the Arishok. The rest of the day went quickly, she was told what to do and when. Never left alone she certainly wasn't short of stone-faced men to complain to. She'd taken to singing to herself while she was sat at the small table yet again in the evening, a soft yet powerful voice she'd inherited from her mother. She sung softly to an old tavern song she was fond of, while tracing her finger over the polished table, she continued as an elf she didn't know entered and left the familiar basket and teapot on the table. He'd scurried out again before Hawke could catch his eye. She hadn't even realised the Arishok had come in and was now standing behind her, she probably shouldn't have sat with her back to the door. However, she was getting better at not jumping out of her skin when being snuck up on.

"Eat." Is all he said, sitting cross-legged at the opposite end of the table.

She felt pretty embarrassed by the idea of the Arishok listening to her sing. She didn't know why, she wasn't normally concerned with who over-heard her. And much to her horror a blush had crept over her face. Widening her eyes she stared at her feet, willing the heat in her face away. He said nothing, merely pouring them both some of the sweet tea and helping himself to food. His hair was wet and to her shock he didn't have any paint or chest armour on. She swallowed hard at the sight of the hulking man, with beads of water dropping from his hair and running down his chest. His white hair was longer now, reaching past his collar bone. His horns still bore the gold bangles they'd always had, and she'd always wondered why his were so much bigger, and why he had more. She subconsciously rubbed her neck at the thought of having something so heavy on her head. Maybe that's why he always seemed grumpy.

"Eat." He reminded her, pushing the basket in her direction.

Swallowing she worked up the nerve to ask some of the things that had been bugging her.

"If you catch her... Isabela again, what will you do?"  
"Return to Par Vollen, the rest is not your concern." He grunted, sitting back and breathing in the sweet steam from the tea.

"What of me?" She almost squeaked at the sight of his chest flexing.

"That is yet to be decided."

Suddenly feeling nauseas, she found her appetite had left her. Nibbling delicately on a bread roll she retreated into her thoughts. Would they kill her off? Or imprison her? She stayed lost in her mind until the Arishok's deep voice ordered her to sleep.

He watched over her for the first few hours of her slumber, somewhat unable to focus on his papers. Almost perplexed by what was to be done with Hawke once she was no longer needed. She was too useful to discard, even back in Kirkwall he had encouraged her to submit. She had changed a lot from that time, no longer prey to the whim and politics of the scum around her. He was almost impressed with the changes he saw in her, she seemed to be mostly done with need to find humour in things. He remembered overseeing her actions from the compound walls, the way her companions would flock to her wherever she went, she was their leader and a worthy opponent, the only Basalit-an he'd encountered so far- and a woman no less. Yet now she seemed more dangerous, unpredictable. As if she had no regard of her own life. She needed order. The Qun would guide her, whether she knew it or not yet. Anaan esaam Qun.

She awoke abruptly that morning to the sound of horns being blown. Instinctively she reached for a weapon no longer there, the Arishok was sat by the small eating table, a male elf was applying his war-paint. The first rays of light were hidden by the storm that darkened the skies as a Sten burst into the tent, the Arishok raised a hand to pause the elf's work.

He stood in the doorway, almost panting. "The thief." Was all he said, out of breath.

Witnessing Hawke tense the Arishok growled in warning, but it was drowned out by her thoughts. _If I could just warn her, something..._  
The Arishok grabbed his axe, shoving the elf from his reach just as Hawke sprang from her bed, it took her seconds to reach the tired Sten, throwing him into the path of the oncoming warlord. She ran, heart in her chest, to the hole blown through the wall in the compound, stomach turning at the sound of the Arishok's roar.

Very few Sten were fast enough to slow her path, and she was able to disable them quickly. Her bare feet pounded the ground as she made it out of the compound and into the forest, not entirely sure where she was going. Every time she thought she saw a flash of that blue bandana she chased it, ignoring the branches scraping at her skin and whipping her and she sped through them. Eventually she was lost, out of breath and at a dead end, soaked through and muddied. She seemed to be at the base of some sort of cliff. No sooner had she stopped than the air was knocked from her body by a blow to her back. She hadn't even heard the beast-like man on her trail. Hitting her back against the rock she slid to a sitting position, defeated. Something told her this was not going to end well, she almost whimpered as the warlord stormed the few paces between them. He raised his axe to hit her again, and it was only then she noticed her back bleeding from the shallow wound, and then her attention turned to the few rocks that seemed to be trickling down the wall, the shake of the earth...  
She had no time to think and she had no idea why she reacted the way she did, but she dove for the Arishok, catching him off guard and tackling to the ground just as a huge chunk of the cliff slammed into where he would've been. It took him a few moment to realise that Hawke had probably just saved his life, leaving him unable to react when the mud and rock slide covered them both.

He awoke an unknown amount of time later, in the dark. A few large rocks had fallen over them which stopped them from being smothered, and the weight on his chest let him know Hawke was still there.

"Hawke?" He spoke, and couldn't help but feel relived when she gave a weak cough in response. He did what he could to feel what was around them, they had very little space to move, but most of entrapment seemed to be held together with hardened loose mud, if he could get enough leverage he could break them out.

"You need to move, Hawke." He spoke, continuing to feel the walls around them before he realised she wasn't responding. "Hawke?" He tried again, manoeuvring one hand to her back to shake her. She groaned in response, her breaths sort and shallow against his chest.

"Spinning..." Was just about all Hawke could manage to whimper.

From his hand on her back he realised she was only in her chest wrap and trousers, and they were both soaked from the rain and sweat.

"My Vitaar" He hissed, feeling his chest, the paste between his fingers confirmed his not yet dry paint had spread to her bare skin too. He felt a form of panic rise in him, knowing she wouldn't have long. The wet Vitaar was very toxic to other races, and her front was covered in it.

The Arishok managed to work Hawke beneath him, kneeling over her- careful not to crush her small frame. He bucked his horns into the earth above him, forcing his back to slam against the earth to loosen it, becoming more frantic as her breaths turned to short wheezes. Finally, with a roar he managed to break through, able to use his arms he pushed and clawed the rest of the dirt away from them. It was still raining however, and the wet earth quickly moved to suck them under again. Grabbing Hawke by her midsection he was barely able to roll away as the whole thing collapsed once more. He stood, and even though the skies remained darkened by the storm he could see how pale she'd become, as she lay limp in his arms. He began a full on charge back to the compound, crushing any obstacle in his path as he ran- knowing as long as she was alive he could bring her back. There wasn't time to him to think and barely time for the Sten to open the gates as he charged back into the compound- barking at the first person he saw to bring the antidote to the bath house. Not once did he break his stride there, pausing only for a second when he realised he would have to wash her. Most of the men were being used to up the guard and repair the defences, there was practically no one around.

He burst into the bathing tent and kicked off his boots, grabbing a glass decanter filled with a thick orange liquid and easily cradling the small Hawke in one arm as he clambered into the closest tub. Letting the water out he pulled a lever to start the shower spout above them.

The elf Viddathari that had been painting him earlier reached down to hand him a small glass vial before being dismissed. He bit the cork out with his sharp teeth and opened Hawke's mouth to tip the antidote down her throat. Almost immediately her breathing began to normalise, but it would be worthless if he didn't remove the rest of the paint from her. Hawke was covered from when she'd tackled him, and from their time spent crushed together underground. Her arms, stomach and chest were all smeared with the blood red Vitaar.

He grabbed a cloth and covered it with the orange liquid, as it was designed to dissolve the paint back into a harmless water that could be washed away. He scrubbed at her body until it began to redden, and realising the paint had smeared under her garments he used his claws to rip them off. Qunari did not fluster over the body the way most did. It was not something shameful to hide or be forcefully lusted over as humans and others did. The sight didn't faze him, although he was sure she'd be plenty flustered when she found out. He crouched in the bottom of the large wooden tub, with the now nude Hawke rested against his soaked trousers. He gently leant her forward to scrub her back, careful around the wound he'd inflicted earlier. She remained limp and unconscious as he made sure the poison was scrubbed from her body. Once he was done he cradled her in his arms as one would a bride to check it was gone. Without the clothing and muck he could see her clearly now, a porcelain doll littered with battle scars. He recognised one across her stomach and hip as the mark of a dragon, and he almost felt proud. As he began to lift her, her head fell back, exposing her long pale neck. Seeing something there he hadn't expected he paused. It was high up on her neck for what it was, but it did not change what someone had attempted to do. It was a long thin scar from one side of her neck to the other. Feeling an anger bubble up inside him he hadn't anticipated, he composed himself as he contemplated it's story.

Barking at the black haired Viddathari charged with Hawke's care for a towel he was handed one, which he gingerly wrapped her in, almost afraid that she would break at his touch, before handing her to a Sten to take to the medical tent. He stayed behind to scrub the rest of the ruined Vitaar from his body, his face twisted in a deep thought.


	4. Chapter 4

Hawke awoke in a white tent, bleary-eyed and with a soreness that settled into her very bones. Her memory remained a haze as the Viddathari elf she'd taken to calling 'Vid' babbled away in her explanation of the events. All she could remember was tackling the Arishok. Hawke's skin steadily reddened as Vid's narration continued until finally-

"WHAT. NO. WHAT!?" Too mortified to make a sentence Hawke sunk into the medical bed like a punished child. "Whhhhhhhhhhhhhyyyyyyy!?" She whined, causing the others being treated in the tent to glare her way.

"It was necessary." Vid shrugged, suppressing a giggle at Hawke's horrified expression.

"You were there! Why couldn't-"

"You were already nude by that point."

"Of for the love of Andraste's arse!" Hawke cussed, falling back and pulling the sheet over her head. "Pronounce me dead." She mumbled from the sheets. "I didn't make it."

"Come now!" Vid giggled, pulling the sheet back and tidying her patient's hair. "The Qunari aren't like normal men, they aren't so easily phased or lustful."

As reassuring as that was meant to be, Hawke couldn't help but feel slightly offended by the idea of her nudity not stirring anything. She could picture it now, the Arishok scrubbing her at arms length with a nose peg on. 'Maker strike me down' she'd prayed to herself, all the way back to the large tent she now called home. Apparently she'd been out for three days, perhaps he'd forgotten it all? Yeah. Right. She scoffed as she dragged her feet up the stone steps. Finally she reached the tent, and slipped inside willing her existence to end.

"Hawke." He'd greeted her. There'd be no avoiding him it seems. "You are recovered?" Briefly lifting his gaze as his eyes flicked over her form.

"Uh, yes. You saved my life." She mumbled, twiddling her hands in front of her and refusing to make eye contact. Was that a new pillow? That's a nice pillow.

"As you did mine, Basalit-an." He'd grunted. With some sort of respectful nod he turned back to his papers.

Hawke breathed a sigh of relief as his gaze turned away, and she attempted to shuffle over to her bed. The relief however, was short lived when he spoke again.

"Here, Hawke." He gestured her over as one would a dog. She'd be grinding her teeth if she wasn't so mortified.

Moving to stand in front of him as he sat in his chair, she tried as hard as she could to will the heat away from her face. Swallowing hard, she was surprised to see a hint of something in his eyes, concern? He'd stood to tower over her, and she almost swooned to find her face level with his chiselled chest no more than a breath away.

"Uhm..." She'd started, only to be cut off by a clawed hand lifting her chin to make her meet his gaze. Touching her face, she felt the need to check it wasn't on fire as she pulled back.

Continuing to look her up and down he finally seemed satisfied and sat back down.

"You're behaving differently, Hawke." He almost scolded as he watched her from his desk.

"Well. Um. It's a matter of modesty I guess." She'd mumbled. 'Still hanging on that death wish, Maker.' Closing her eyes from a moment she tried to force a casual smile to her face.

"These things do not matter." Waving a hand he almost seemed intrigued by her reaction.

Remembering that the Qunari were a studios people, she suddenly felt rather silly. Of course he must of seen these sorts of things before! The Qunari liked to know everything about everything. She almost shuddered at the idea of Qunari dissecting humans behind closed doors.

"Well I guess it's all old news." she shrugged it off, desperately trying to seem casual. A brief frown crossed his face, and realising he'd probably never heard the saying she felt the need to explain.

"I mean, I'm sure it's nothing new, you must've seen other humans in the nude..." Where the fuck was she going with this? Shut up Hawke, she cussed herself.  
"No." He replied, as Hawke began mentally kicking herself black and blue. Her face reddening at the ever more awkward conversation she began playing with a loose string at the base of her vest. "They are not worthy." He'd shrugged, opening an old book in his lap and finally relieving her of his gaze.

Scurrying over to her bed she dove into the furs, wishing it was a portal to somewhere else. His words lingered in her mind though, not worthy? Does that mean he'd considered it? How would that even work?

She found herself babbling all these things to Vid the next morning as the petite elf watched her train.

"Oh Hawke!" She'd wheezed after a long laugh. Vid hadn't seen anything particularly embarrassing in the situation, but Hawkes reaction had tickled her to the point she decided to tease her further. "Well it has been quite a while."

Hawke missed her aim on that comment and stumbled sideways. "What are you on about? A while?!" She'd spluttered.

"Well it's been..." Slowly counting on her fingers, Vid dragged the moment out. "Nearly 7 years? That's quite the... What's the phrase now..." She timed her next comment just as Hawke made another swing with the curved blade. "Dry spell?" Vid looked a picture of innocence as Hawke swung far too hard and set herself in a spin, landing on her rear.

"WHY WOULD YOU EVEN SAY THAT?" The black haired warrior had shouted from the dust.

"Well back in Par Vollen the Tamassran assign sexual partners for mating and, well, 'relief'. I suppose the Arishok hasn't been 'relieved' in a while, and it is a rather stressful job..." She'd trailed off as the red faced Hawke stormed off, hands over ears.

At a loss for where to go, Hawke wandered aimlessly about the compound for a while. There was no way she could face the Arishok at the moment, especially with Vid's comments still bouncing around at the front of her mind. But he always seemed to be in his tent or at his perch out front, and it was hard to avoid a guy you lived with. Eventually she found herself back at those stone steps, and allowed herself to take a seat half way up them. Hawke had spent the whole day training, and the days were becoming shorter as winter neared. Vid's jibes still on her mind, she couldn't help but realise it had been a while for herself too. She'd had no interest or time since leaving Kirkwall, being so preoccupied with various battles and self-improvements. She was ample busted, had long legs and as more firm and toned than ever, her fair face and petite, curved body had never left her short of courting men. But she had no time for the rat faced nobles and squirrely merchants her mother had tried to pair her with. Not that they'd be so appealed by her battle- scarred body now. She was a warrior, and she knew she'd spend the rest of her life with a sword in her hand. She'd never even stopped to think about having a family of her own, but she was happy in her own skin. She hadn't had an easy life, and there were many regrets, but she was a steel forged in fire. There sure as hell wouldn't be any breaking her now. She nodded to her self in reassurance, as the warm sun slowly disappeared over the horizon. She watched the other Qunari bustle about in the compound around her and began softly singing to herself.

Men were oiling armour and sharpening weapons, Vid had explained to her one evening that it was a great sign of respect to be allowed clean another's armour and weapons. She wondered if any of them were doing that now, Vid had also explained that they took a lot of pride in their 'tools', and it was seen as a great shame to loose them and carried a severe punishment. Hawke sat in her thoughts for a while longer, before hearing the Arishok come to stand on the step behind her. The smell of spices and baking from the streets filed her nose as she breathed deeply. The time alone had calmed her and she no longer felt like a teenage girl in his presence.

"Shanedan, Arishok." She'd greeted, rising to walk past him and up the rest of the steps.

She tried not to linger on his face for long but swore he almost seemed surprised by her use of the word. He'd nodded in return to her and walked with her back to the tent. They sat at their usual place opposite one another as a Viddathari delivered their food, it was different tonight. There was a sweet bread loaf with what looked like slices of orange baked into it, various other fresh fruits, a generous rump of sliced meat was placed in the middle along with what looked like some bottles of sealed wine. The elf returned again to place a wooden bowl of small dough-like balls, she assumed were dumplings, down along with a small bowl of nuts and a plate of cheeses. She heard her stomach rumble and almost drooled at the sight of the feast, and the wine! She hadn't had a drink it what must have been nearly a year now.

"A special occasion?" She'd asked, bringing herself to make eye contact. The Arishok provided her with a short nod as he poured what she'd assumed was wine.

"Maraas-Lok." He offered some to her. She took it and cradled it her hands for a while as she watched him sip. finally braving her own first sip she almost choked. Seeing what looked like amusement on his face she forced down another sip of the burning alcohol, finding it went straight to her head.

"What... Is that?" Hawke questioned him, throat still raw.

"Maraas-Lok." He'd repeated. "Qunari alcohol."

Putting on a brave face Hawke managed to finish the last of her cup, only to her horror to have the Arishok refill both their drinks. Forcing a smile she nibbled on a dumpling, finding an explosion of flavour in her mouth. The dough was soft and lightly crisp, filled with a warm spiced meat and some kind of fruit. It was sweet and sour at the same time, having never had anything like it she'd helped herself to another as the Arishok also began to fill his plate.

After they were done eating the drink continued to flow, she'd move to lean her back against his bed, tracing her hand over the intricate red and gold carpet. Her new position was somewhat closer to the Arishok, but she found her steadily blurring vision needed the closer distance as much as the support of the bed.

They'd been speaking at length of Par Vollen as he fondly recalled the smells and sights he'd grown up with. She couldn't imagine the Arishok as a boy, and briefly pictured a rather cartoonish child with too many horns head-butting everything. Hawke suppressed a giggle to herself.

"Do you miss it?" She sighed, trying to picture the land he'd been describing.

"It has been a long time."

Her eyes briefly widened as Vid's earlier comments sprang to mind. Shaking her head she dismissed them, taking a much more pleasant sip of a spiced wine they'd moved onto. The heat of the tent became apparent as the Arishok loosened his shoulder pads ever so slightly. The candles all around them made it seem like a hot summers day, but the sweet smell and warm light they provided comforted her. They must have been speaking long into the night, and she rose to put a few out, leaving only their sitting area in the soft light. Tripping on a fold in the rug she found herself falling and pre-emptively winced. Much to her surprise her fall was halted by a very solid arm, as the Arishok quickly rose to catch the somewhat drunk Hawke.

"Careful." He'd chided as she mumbled an apology, quickly pushing herself back from the mass of muscle and scurrying back to her seat and wine. He lingered where they'd stood for a moment longer, and she could have sworn she saw him sniff the air. She sat now with her back to the small table, and he moved to sit on the bed, facing her, making Hawke feel miniscule. Assuming this was his way of saying it was late, she gulped the last of her wine and rose. As she went to pass him, she noticed the still wet wax of a candle had dripped onto one of his armoured shoulders. Without thinking she stepped forward to wipe it away, her actions surprising both of them.

"Uh, the wax dripped." She babbled, once again all flustered as she realised his face was inches from her chest. "Sorry..." She practically whispered, finding her intoxicated self lost in his silver eyes. She'd never seen him so close up. The intricate curve of his horns, how soft the long white hair looked, the way the candle light rested on his stone like skin. His mouth opened slightly as if to say something, but no noise came out- only leaving his pointed white teeth exposed.

Before she knew what was happening Hawke lowered her mouth to his.

Gasping and jumping back at the surprise of her own actions, she stumbled and fell onto her rear. Her fingers lingered over her mouth, secretly savouring the sensation. He let out a growl from deep in his chest, but it wasn't one of anger. Standing quickly he stepped forward as Hawke backed into the table, knocking an open bottle of wine down her front. Groaning in frustration as the wine soaked into her clothes she closed her eyes, willing herself to stand up without falling over.

Letting out a series of curses under her breath she maneuvered herself on to all fours before trying to push herself up. She barely heard the deep growl the Arishok let out as he grabbed an arm and pulled her to her feet. 'Great!' she thought 'Snog the guy and make a mess, now you've really pissed him off.' She rolled her eyes.

"Sorry, sorry, sorry!" She felt as if she'd repeated it 100 times, as he pulled her out some clean clothes. Without thinking she began to undress, in nothing but her underwear and soaked chest wrap when he turned around.

"Uhh," She'd flustered, grabbing the vest and holding it over her chest. "Old news?" She tried to joke, but remained mortified when he pulled the vest back from her.

"You'll make it wet." He gestured to the soaked chest wrap that really wasn't hiding anything by this point anyway. Red faced, Hawke turned her back to the Arishok, slowly unravelling the wrap with her eyes closed- willing away her embarrassment. Feeling uncomfortable in just her panties she was about to reach back for him to hand her the vest, when she was stilled by a large warm hand over her back. She sucked in a gasp of air at the feeling, before realising his fingers were tracing a scar on scar on her lower back. Moving her long hair round to her front she realised he lingered over the wound he'd inflicted that day at the cliff. It was starting to scar.

"It's okay." Hawke smiled at him over her shoulder. "I'm hardly a clean slate." She giggled. Gesturing to the rest of her body, her back still turned to him. To her surprise she felt his hand move to another scar.

"Wolf attack." She'd explained, and this continued for a while. The Arishok would move his hand over a scar and she'd explain it. She clutched her hands over her chest as he turned her to face him, with him now crouching he gestured to her knees.

"Ah!" She laughed, proud of what these stood for. "Freed a bastard nobles' slaves, he had someone break my legs and throw me in jail. Got out easily enough when all was healed." He looked up at her, an interest sparked in his deep silver eyes. Hawke shivered slightly as his hand ran up the outside of her leg and she stumbled back. Catching her the Arishok used the arm wrapped around her to pull her forward, causing Hawke to fall in his lap. He seemed almost amused by the mortified look on Hawkes face, as it glowed pink with the wine and embarrassment. A serious look crossed his face as his tilted her chin up and brushed her hair back so he could see her neck. Gasping she clasped her arms defensively over her chest once more. Tracing his thumb over the thin white line, it was a scar with a more personal story. She gently took a hold of his hand with both of hers and pulled it away from her neck. He grunted, displeased with her actions.

"That one" She gave a sad smile "Is in the past." Curiosity getting the better of him he growled, weaving a hand in her hair and pulling her head back so he could see it again. Hawke slapped a hand over her mouth all too late to suppress a soft moan. He froze then, looking straight into her horrified eyes. He seemed to watch her expression for far too long in the candle lit tent, as he sat cross legged on the ground with her legs around his waist. His hand remained in her hair, pulling her head back slightly and forcing her to arc her back- pressing her ample bosom against his strong chest.

Saying nothing he ceased his inspection, lifting her off him as he stood. There was a conflicted look in his eyes as he watched her dress before ushering her to her own bed.

Hawke sank into the soft furs and the silk pillows with the horrified look still set in her face. She couldn't believe the events of the evening and was sure he'd lost all respect for her now as she laid perfectly still, her back to the Arishok's bed. In a weird way though, she could've sworn he didn't mind. Perhaps it was the drink? Either way she was bound to be scolded in the morning. 'The Qun will not allow such behaviour!' She could already hear in the back of her mind as she drifted off into a deep slumber.

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Don't hate me! Haha, I promise there will be more cheeky behaviour soon!  
Reviews and feedback welcome!


	5. Chapter 5

Much to her surprise Arishok was not around when she awoke, and she found herself dining alone that night. The next day was the same, she'd fall asleep before he'd return and awake after he'd gone. Whenever she'd ask about him she be told "The Arishok has better things to do than babysit." Grilling Vid at her morning training session on the third day, Hawke found her of little help.

"He is the leader of the whole Antaam, Hawke. I'm sure he's very busy!" She'd chided, watching Hawke train from her usual perch.

Now she was storming back to the tent, arms folded and a face like thunder. She was almost certain he was avoiding her, and a whole week without more than a passing glance confirmed that. It had now been seven days since that night in the tent. Hawke wanted answers, and maker damned she was going to get them. That night, after yet another solitary meal, she crawled into bed and she waited. She often had her limits pushed, not sleeping for a night wouldn't be a problem. She may not be allowed to disturb him at his work, but he would have to sleep, and she could wait.

When the Arishok finally did brave his own tent, it was long gone midnight. He paused at the entrance, watching Hawke's body for the steady breathing of a deep sleep before entering. No sooner had he taken his first step into the tent, than he found a silk pillow greeting his face. He sighed deeply as it dropped to the floor, turning a tired gaze to the woman now sat up in her bed.

"Shanedan Hawke. Was that necessary?" He spoke in the gravelly voice she'd come to miss. He motioned to the pillow on the floor with a raised eyebrow.

"Don't you 'shanedan' me. And yes, it was appropriate." She kept her voice as even as possible as she sat on her bed, arms folded across her chest.

"This" the Arishok lowered to pick up the pillow "is not an appropriate use of furniture." He scolded. He seemed to sniff the air as he stood again, quickly throwing the pillow back to Hawke's bed. He sighed again as he turned the large wooden chair at his desk to face her. He sat down, lacing his fingers and resting his head on his hands. Seemingly sitting as far from Hawke as possible, as if he'd expected the confrontation. She was certain the Sten had passed on her pestering. But his distance only seemed to aggravate her further.

"Where have you been?" She demanded.

"I am no pet to be monitored." He snapped, almost turning his nose up.

He was under her skin now, and Hawke still had a hot temper after all these years. If her presence bothered him so much then she was going to make a point to move closer. So she did. Glaring at him she moved to sit on his bed, arms and legs folded, Hawke sat opposite the Arishok, as close as she could without moving to the floor between them. The Arishok shook his head and rubbed his forehead with his palm.

"Oh, I'm sorry, does this bother you?" She pouted, shuffling closer.

"Yes." He hissed.

"It didn't bother you that night. Or in the baths. Why can you invade my space, and not visa versa?" She knew she was testing his patience, but she was itching for a fight and she dared him with her glare.

"Hawke." He warned, standing to move away.

"Andraste's left tit am I letting you walk off again!" Hawke snapped, grabbing him by the elbow. Keeping his back to her, he merely turned his head to glare at her from over his shoulder. His warnings however, were only met by the fiery gaze of the human female. Hawke was surprised to find his whole body seemed to be... vibrating with energy. The skin her hand touched was hot.

"You're testing my patience, Hawke." He growled, pulling his arm away and turning to meet her glare with one of his own.

"If only I'd killed you that day, I could've spared you all this annoyance!" She shouted, throwing her arms in the air.

To her utter shock he laughed. It was short and spiteful, but it was a laugh all the same. He stepped to her, glaring down at her from over his chest, relishing his dominance. "Hah! As if you could accomplish such a feat." He snarled.

_-SLAP-_

Her action left them both in a stunned silence. Her eyes were wide, staring in shock as her small hand barely left a mark on his cheek. His head remained turned to the side by the action as he slowly processed the event. Hawke swallowed, hard. 'Ah, fuck.' She cussed, as she saw his arm tense just in time to expect the oncoming backhand. Knocked to the floor with the force of the blow, she laid there, stunned. Slowly, Hawke turned her head to glare at him through her raven hair. Normally soft blue eyes were narrowed to an icy white. She pushed herself up into a crouched position, wiping the blood from the edge of her mouth with the back of her hand. The Arishok was growling, the heat he radiated she could now feel without even touching him. Adrenaline pumping, she knew she wanted to see the stone bastard bleed. She dove through his legs and jumped on his back, wrapping an arm around his neck she squeezed as hard as could. 'No going back now.' She snarled to herself. He roared, hands easily prying the small arm from his neck. Hawke used her free hand to grab a large horn and yanked as hard as she could, jumping away just as he lashed out. He was terrifying to look at, and her body shook with excitement. She gave sadistic grin while diving at him again, hitting a pressure point in his knee causing it to buckle. He growled and grabbed her by the throat before throwing her back against her bed- smashing it in the process. He forced himself to stand, even on the temporarily crippled leg, which is scarily impressive. Throwing herself back to her feet Hawke spat the blood from her mouth. She was faster, yes, but it would take him minimal full strength blows to put her on her arse for good. Maker, this was thrilling! She felt a heat flow though her, and the same heat warmed her cheeks and made her breaths unsteady. It was a probably a worrying sign that she enjoyed the fight as much as she did. But there was just something about the chiselled, overbearing, dominant, alluring yet frustrating man that set the blood racing through her veins and her skin on fire. They stood there for a moment, opposite sides of the tent, like two lions circling. This time it was he who charged at her, both hands raised in a fist, she ducked between his legs and delivered a swift kick to the damaged knee. It gave out beneath him, but he swilled and delivered a blow that sent her rolling across the floor. She stopped as her head hit the corner of the bed. Hawke tried to make herself stand, blurry-eyed from the blow, and ended up tumbling back onto his bed. He stood again and strode to her with a slight limp. He grabbed her by the ankle as she tried to scramble away from him, dragging her under him as he knelt on the bed. His hand moved to neck as he glared into her eyes. Gasping for breath Hawke felt a heat flush through her again. The Arishok's eyes widened and he growled as tightened his grip. Dizzy and struggling to stay conscious, Hawke fought beneath him, scratching and flailing. Finally, her retaliations stopped and her eyes slowly began close, only to fly open a second later as he released his hand- allowing the air to flow into her lungs once again. She curled into a ball, coughing and gasping as he still knelt over her. His breathing was heavy as he watched her come to life again. Before Hawke could lash out he placed a hand on her neck again, with no pressure, but the threat was there. She became still as her eyes studied his face.

"You would do well to remember your place." He spoke.

"Beneath you?" She choked out a laugh, it had been a joke, but she couldn't deny the excitement flowing through her as he dominated her in this moment. He growled, but it was different. It wasn't angry, and he will still giving off that insane heat. She placed a hand on his chest and felt the way he vibrated under her touch.

"What is with you?" She rasped, meeting his gaze again. The Arishok took a deep breath and seemed to... shudder. His hand released her neck as he pulled away. It was soon replaced by her own smaller ones, rubbing the sore skin.

"Why have you been avoiding me?" She asked. He turned to her, surprised to see the fight gone from her eyes, replaced by a hurt that went much deeper than his actions. "I am so sick of people leaving me." She whispered, blinking back the tears as she refused to meet his eyes.

The Arishok groaned and fell into a sitting position next the small crumpled woman on his bed. Rubbing his sore knee as he considered his reply.

"You have become a... Distraction." He finally spoke. Looking at his own hands as she finally turned to look at him.

"What do you mean?" Her eyes searched his face, as if the best poker face ever known was going to betray anything.

He sighed deeply, rubbing his temples- as if debating something very awkward. "You have a... Scent, Hawke."  
"What the hell are you on about?" She huffed, sitting up and crossing her arms.

"It is recent." Pausing he searched for words. "It is a smell... Our females emanate it during copulation to ensure... completion. Yet you bear it in strength and constantly." He explained, waving at the air around him as if willing her to see what he described.

Hawke sat there, with her mouth agape. "Bullcrap," She retaliated without even thinking, as if the Arishok would make such a thing up!  
He growled and stood as she almost laughed at the idea.

"Are you accusing me of seducing you?! It's not intentional! I bath, daily!" She babbled, red faced as she aired her clothes against her. Which, judging by the pained look on his face, only made things worse. "I don't smell anything?!"

"Your kind's senses are far too dull. I did not realise humans were even capable of..." He trailed off, not finding the words.

"You guys sure seem to complicate things, how do you even do it anyway?" She mumbled, regretting the words before they'd even left her mouth. The Arishok shot her a look that she couldn't quite read. He returned to his chair by the now messy desk, and appeared to sit in thought for a moment. Hawke continued to sit on his bed, once again cross-legged, yet awkwardly stiff with the embarrassment of her outburst. By Varric's lewd bible, she'd actually just asked the Arishok about his sex life. After he'd nearly just choked her to death. Nice one Hawke.

"It would not be pleasant." He concluded. "Your kind... You are much too... soft." He spoke slowly, gesturing to the already extensively bruised Hawke. Her cheeks reddened slightly with the thoughts that came to mind, as the familiar heat of arousal drifted through her. The Arishok growled, evidently smelling her reaction.

"Some of us enjoy the damage." She spoke, turning her gaze away shyly.

"I can tell." He grunted. "It was unclear whether you wanted to fight or mate."

Hawke spluttered in her embarrassment, pulling a blanket over herself, as if that would hide her shame.

"Did you consider it?" She asked without thinking.

It seemed like an hour before he replied, the sky outside was already beginning to lighten. "You are different, you alone are Basalit-an." Her heart skipped a beat at his words, and fell with the next. "But it is not permitted."

"Why?"

"Interspecies mating would serve no purpose." He sat back, surer of himself now.

"And what of personal need?" she pushed, moving to kneel in front of him, her hands on his knees. He visibly struggled with how close she was, retreating as far back as he could into the chair. "It serves the purpose of..." She recalled Vid's words. "Relief? It keeps a mind clear."

He closed his eyes for a moment, thinking on her words. The Tamassran did grant opportunities for 'relief'. He let out a pained groan as she did something to his knee, and the pain from it vanished. She smiled and stood.

"Can't leave the Arishok in pain now." Hawke winked.

Try as he might, he did not understand the woman. He stood and went to leave.

"You're not staying?" She called after him, yawning.

"There is no sleep to be had here, and your scent has claimed my bed, Hawke." She could've sworn he had a small smile as he left, there was at least humour in his voice. Hawke turned to the only bed left, his, and shrugged as she clambered in and let sleep take her.

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**Okay, so maybe I'm cruel! But I want to be as true to his character as possible. Besides, it wouldn't be fun if it were easy! ;D**


	6. Chapter 6

Maturity warning! The first of many? ;D 

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It had been another few days since the encounter in the tent, and Hawke found herself without the company of the Arishok again- or any Qunari for that matter. She felt so embarrassed to now know the reason all the men ignored her, hurriedly ducking into various tents and buildings as she walked about. Her thoughts had turned to Isabela, there had been no sign of her since the day she'd blown a neat little hole in the side of the compound. If that had even been her. With any luck she'd realise it was hopeless and would move on. But what would become of Hawke, then? Would they really hold on to her until they found Isabela again? She supposed her situation could be worse, she was allowed to train, was fed and had a real bed for the first time in years. But her feelings towards the Qunari Warlord had her conflicted. Hawke had respected him since Kirkwall, she couldn't deny the shiver he sent up her spine, even then. She sighed as she entered the bathhouse, noticing the usual Saarebas and Arvaarad that monitored her. As she started to disrobe she noticed the Arvaarad step outside and sighed again. Sitting on a small stool in her undergarments she watched the Saarebas. Hawke wondered if he was more resistant to her company, as Saarebas were not allowed to mate. As she motioned him to come over he shifted uncomfortably before complying. He kneeled to be at the same level as her. She took a moment to study him, the gold mask that was tied to his horns. Reaching out Hawke traced a hand over his stitched lips and felt a pang in her heart. Bethany had been a mage, imagining her like this broke her heart. But Hawke couldn't say that she was particularly fond of mages after what that monster had done to her mother, she could only be glad Bethany had not survived to see it, or her father, or Carter. Saarebas grunted as a sad look fell over Hawke. Here she was pitying herself when this beast had never known love to have lost it. She moved her hand to his horns, tracing her fingers over the rough edges where they'd been cut short. She couldn't help but wonder why they did that, was binding and collaring it not enough? She found herself wondering what he was thinking, as he knelt, open to her touch. He did not flinch or move, so blinded by the need to obey that his own discomfort meant nothing to him. This Saarebas was the same one she often found herself having one sided conversations with, much to the frustration of the Arvaarad. He would answer her occasional questions with a grunt or a shake of his head- which is more than she could get from most. And he seemed to be the only Qunari in the compound not avoiding her.

"Saarebas" She started, unsure of herself "do I... Have a smell? A scent?" She finally questioned, trying to read what she could while he remained silent behind the mask. After a while he nodded.

"And the others, it bothers them?" Again he nodded. "Does it bother you?" He shook his head. Remembering the way Ketojan had been immune to anything but his orders, she supposed this situation was similar. The Saarebas would not do or feel anything unless they were told to, the way a boat needed someone to row it.

"How do I get rid of this scent?" Hawke asked, only to feel foolish when the Saarebas grumbled. "Oh yeah, yes or no questions, sorry." She sighed and leant back, rubbing her temples. At least the Arishok wasn't making up this smell thing to avoid her. "That will be all." She smiled at the beast, and he returned to his post as she submersed herself in the hot tub. Blocking out the world for the next hour, she allowed her mind to wander.

Returning to the tent that night she was surprised to see the Arishok sat at the desk, turned towards the entrance as if waiting for her.

"Shanedan Arishok." She greeted. He only nodded his response, watching her wearily. "Don't worry, I'm not going to attack you again." Hawke laughed, sitting on the bed opposite him. He shifted and rose to pace, putting more distance between them.

"Look, if there's a way to get rid of the blasted smell thing then let me know, clearly it's affecting everyone!" She finally gave up, exasperated. A low growl started in his chest, not too dissimilar the one he'd had a few nights ago. Hawke closed the gap between them, placing a hand on his arm.

"It's one thing being paranoid, but when you know why all the men around you stare or dive into the nearest tent at your passing... I'm starting to feel like the last steak at a butchers. Obviously no one is comfortable." He grunted in response to her plea.

"I see the way they look." He nodded. "You have become a distraction."

"So, either let me go or make a potion!" She groaned, moving to sit back on the bed.

"You are going nowhere, Hawke." He warned.

"Because you want Isabela or because I smell nice?" His look let her know she was pushing her luck.

"There is no potion for what you are doing, Hawke!" He snapped, clearly unable to focus.

"Oh now I feel bad, let me turn it off. Oh that's right! I can't! So excuse me for everyone else's nose!" She snapped back, glaring up at him.

The Arishok stepped to her, towering over Hawke's agile frame below him on the bed.

"The solution would break you." He spoke, somewhat calmer, as he crouched to be at her eye level. His silver pools traced her body, deep in thought. "But the distraction can not be allowed to continue." His words vibrated over her skin as she shivered with realisation. Pushing her back on the bed, he moved over her, his knees either side of her legs and his large, clawed hands either side of her face.

"Whoa- wait!" spluttering, Hawke tried to shuffle out from under him. "Can't we talk about this!?"

"Your body cries for a mate, and it will have one." He spoke as if unsure of what to do, seemingly at his wit's end.

"What exactly does that entail?" Her voice was almost a whisper as she looked up at him, chest rising and falling with her heavy breaths.

"For you, I am unsure." His eyes bore into hers, searching for something in her deep blue orbs. "Do you submit?"

Hawke's voice almost came out as a squeak. Yes, she wanted this. She could already feel the heat rising from between her thighs, and had to respect the restraint the Arishok was showing her in this moment. He was powerful indeed, every inch of him was perfectly crafted muscle- honed to be the deadliest he could be. She knew how human men could hardly even spell restraint, they'd use any excuse to have their way. It only made her respect him more, as the longing she had for him since Kirkwall bubbled to the surface. Having buried it such a long time ago, never imagining she'd be here, in this moment- with the hulking man requesting to 'mate' with her! Andraste's flaming arse was she letting this opportunity go!

"I submit." Her throat was dry and her voice was hoarse, but her words seemed to spark something in him. In the brief dangerous flicker in his eyes, she realised she had opened the flood gates. He buried his face in her neck, breathing her in, the vibrating in his chest starting. She would definitely have to ask him about that, but right now they were a flurry of desperate touches and needy grasps. She kissed him and he paused, surprised by the sensation. Hesitantly he lowered his head to hers, tasting her mouth and embracing the action as if it were new to him. Steadily his actions became more dominant, as his hand grasped a breast through her clothing and she moaned into the rough kiss. That only seemed to greaten his hunger as he pulled her trousers down and Hawke took the opportunity to remove her vest. Using his claws he ripped the binding from her chest and she gasped as her nipples hardened in the cool air. His eyes lingered on her for a moment, when they stood beside one another she was at his chest. Short, even for a human. But now he was above her she seemed even smaller. She writhed beneath him as he studied her, reaching out a hand to touch his chest.

"Won't the Vitaar...?" She trailed of, remembering her all too recent poisoning.

"It is dry." He reassured. "You are sure?" He asked her, a brief concern in his features. She could only nod in response. "If you wish for things to stop, if you change your mind- say stop and things will be done." He reassured her.

His behaviour made her panic slightly, and she braced herself as his lips crashed against hers once more. His lips traced down her neck, to the crook where her neck met her shoulder and he bit down. Hawke gasped, then groaned in delight as she felt his rough tongue trace the fresh wound. His mouth moved lower as his tongue traced the shape of her breasts, claws lightly dragging along her legs and stomach. One of her hands flew to his hair, entwining there as she moaned at his touch, another hand scratched up his back, hard. Growling in response to this, he grabbed her hair and pulled her into his lap, the way they'd been the other night. He breathed in her scent again, shuddering at it's affect on him as she pushed her bare chest to his. She was warm, another sensation new to him. His own body was heated in response as the vibration coming from him grew steadily stronger until it tingled against her skin to touch him. Kissing him, she desperately reached between them to loose the leather ties of his trousers. He stilled her hand for a moment, as if still wary. Hawke hissed and dragged her nails down his front. He growled and stood, one hand firmly on her buttocks as he easily held her against his waist. She continued to kiss him, tongues battling for control with her legs wrapped around his hips. Faintly recognising the sound of dropped leather she realised he'd used his other hand to undo himself. Standing now in all his glory, with Hawke pressed to his torso as their mouths claimed one another. The way he vibrated stimulated her breasts just by being pressed against him, it was an incredible feeling! The Arishok buried his face in her neck one more time before dropping her back onto the furs.

That's when she saw him, swallowing at the sight of him. Hard chiselled muscled pointed in a V to the largest member she'd seen. Suddenly his comments about her being soft and small held a lot more meaning. She was certainly afraid by the idea of that... trying to fit. But the thought of loosing his attention now was not an idea she was entertaining. Swallowing her doubts she moved up the bed, discarding what was left of her under clothes. He let out a pleased purr at the sight. He moved over her, feeling her shiver when his impossibly warm length grazed against her leg. Without speaking he rolled her over and pulled her onto her knees. She felt exposed, and almost complained at her loss of view, then she felt him press against her. 'There's no way this will work' she chided herself, actually shaking with anticipation. One of his hands held her hip and the other grabbed her rear as he pushed the tip in. He hissed at the feeling of being so tightly enclosed and she cried out into the furs beneath her. The sensation burned, but he was so warm... and the way he vibrated, by the Maker in all his glory she'd never wanted something so painful so much. He slowly pushed further in, eased by her juices which slicked over him. He gave his own loud moan, a noise that set Hawke's pulse racing as she tensed and pushed her face into the pillows, her legs already shaking. As he slowly sank inside Hawke's moans steadily turned into screams of pleasure as she was filled, sobbing, sure she would feel it tomorrow. Already feeling bruised inside just from his entrance, tears flooded her eyes and she was glad he could not see it. Hawke could barely think, it hurt, yes, but it felt amazing, every inch of her was stimulated by his hot pulsing member. He allowed her to adjust for a moment longer before he slowly began to move. At first she cried out, but as he sped up and she adjust her cries turned to loud moans of delight as she reached her peak for the first time in her life, after just a few thrusts. She shook all over and tensed, screaming her pleasure into the furs beneath her as her vision blurred with light spots. Her tightening around him clearly had it's effect, as he growled loudly, thrusting harder. His claws dug into her hips as she moaned for more, determined to see him finish. To her surprise and somewhat horror he went for a fair while longer, eventually turning her back on her back as he kissed her damp cheeks and her sweaty brow. Her hair stuck to her face as she was lost in ecstasy. Feeling him stretch her to her limit with every thrust he pulled her over her peak time and time again as she clung to his horns in support. She bit his lip and dug her own nails into his skin as he groaned in encouragement. He buried his head in her neck again, as if drugged by her smell as his thrusts became erratic, he laced a strong arm under her back while he pulled hair against him, crashing against each other as his body vibrated in a way that electrified them both. A growl started in his chest and steadily became louder and rivalled her own moans, until she felt a flood of heat inside her as he spilled his seed. Groaning in his release he pressed his forehead to hers, looking her in her half lidded eyes as she quickly fell asleep in his arms. 

* * *

Feedback would be hugely appreciated!


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